Hi! This one's a break from the usual important life updates. Just some thoughts I've had swimming around in our head for a while that I want to share. Was showing a game to a friend when we saw a scene involving characters' feelings about their heritage. It of course had me wondering about where we came from. So here's some backstory and feelings about our family tree. (CW: discussions of family and forced bonds, emotional abuse, the usual) Extended family Sunny and I have had a complicated relationship with our extended family for as long as we can remember, and it's been pointed out several times to me by friends how unusual it is. There's several moving parts to why we felt and feel the way we do, that I want to put down in writing. Ever since Sunny was little, there's been this kind of... bubble. Sunny was heavily incentivized to close themself off and only associate with their immediate birth family. Their friendships were looked down on by their birth parents, and they were disa

CW for medical trauma Okay, fuck. Okay. Fuck. Again. I need to get this out. I need to get this out right now. I wrote about the medical trauma I lived through in my late teens in another post, but it goes further than that. For as long as I can remember, my body has not been right. Something has been wrong with it. I was always hyper-sensitive to touch. Everything hurt. In elementary school, it was so unbearable that I got into fights. And even in my youth, years and years of abuse, neglect. Being told by my family that all my sensitivities are in my head. That I'm "just sensitive". That I'm making a big deal out of nothing. I was told this by gym teachers, by staff, by other children, by my family. Nobody cared. I had constant nurse visits throughout my school life. In middle school, I had to go home sick frequently. The dickhead gym teacher turned on loud music that hurt my autism, refused to do anything to accommodate, and anytime I complained of pain, I was told, it's fine, everyo